Thanksgiving Break | Year One
I've now been sick about 4-5 times since September. I'm pretty sure that the majority of my freshman year thus far has been dedicated to recuperating from my latest headache, fever, bodyache, chills, phlegmy cough, dry cough, red eyes, you name the symptom. I've probably down too many doses of Advil and Tylenol to try to eradicate my illnesses. I've probably spent too much time in my bed, coughing my lungs out and using tissue after tissue only to remember I'd be too sick to go out to Target to buy more. I've had to ask people to repeat themselves because my ears were too clogged and I physically couldn't hear what they were saying.
This Thanksgiving - it all came crashing down.
I am at home, sitting in my lonesome while everyone around me has gone home for to celebrate Friendsgiving or have a wonderful meal with their parents, basking in the 60 degree weather of beautiful California. I have two ear infections, a fever, bodyaches, and barely any food to survive off of. Okay, that last part is an exaggeration - I have many cans of soup.
Yes sob me, sob me. This is all so sad I'm having a rough time.
Okay now that we're past that.
Yes, I'm actually so sad that I didn't get to go to New York with my friends to celebrate our first Thanksgiving here on the East Coast and I'm really really really jealous of all my friends who got to go home to their family in the comfort of their own beds while I'm still sleeping on top of the "verging on burning" heater under my dorm bed.
I call my mom everyday during this break to feel closer to home and every time she mentions home I burst into tears because I'm so homesick. I want to feel the California sun so badly, eat KBBQ so much, spend time with my friends sooo much. I miss my home. I miss Cerritos. I miss Whitney. I miss my friends. I miss the love of my life. I miss everything about 90703 and 90701. I miss it all.
My double ear infection has taught me a lot in the span of two days. One is that I have to learn to take better care of myself or I'll end up regretting so much. I have to learn how to dress better, eat better (I've lost 10 pounds?)... just take care of myself better. Two is that I need to appreciate my roots more when I'm there. All I could talk about when I was in Cerritos was how much I wanted to leave and how tired I was of the sun and the heat. Oh my God what I would give to go back to that 90 degree, shorts and tank top weather. Three is that growing up is so hard. To be independent and to be sick on your own is very very difficult and that it takes time and learning to know how to deal with it.
So for all of you home for Thanksgiving, know how blessed you are to be there right now because I would give anything to be with my parents right now and with my friends, sitting around a dinner table or going out to eat as a family. Instead I'm struggling to breathe through my nose and swimming in a sea of tissues. Too much information? Haha, but in all realness - I'll be fine. I'll survive :)
Happy Thanksgiving! I am grateful for my friends and my family who I love so dearly and am learning to love more while I spend my break at Harvard alone.