home(less) & heart(less)

I'm not quite sure, which is probably not the answer someone would want to read on an application, but it's the truth that I will stand by. All I am sure of is that I am ashamed of myself for dehumanizing homeless people because of the situation that they are in right now. Instead of thinking of them as human beings first, I am immediately afraid and shrink away from even trying to understand them. I am no longer open to hearing their histories but rather am quick to judge and want to avoid the conversation all together. When a man who was struggling financially asked me for $5 at Tea-Do, I was overcome with immense fear and anxiety instead of an immediate willingness to lend a helping hand. Yes, there are people who may use the money for not-so-good things, but there are people who do in fact need the money to survive and purchase basic necessities. How would I feel if I was at the mercy of a stranger who seemed to be afraid and disgusted by my mere presence? A disgusting exterior that came from a lack of water because I couldn't support myself financially? What if that man had been my father asking for money? How would I have felt... I have not experienced much homelessness in my life. I lived in a quiet little suburb an hour away from Los Angeles in California and rarely saw homeless people. To come to Cambridge, an area with a large homeless population, is a culture shock to me and a wake up call that not everyone is as privileged and lucky as I have been during my lifetime. I need Y2Y (an organization) to be my wake up call. I need it to be part of my journey in hearing the stories of everyone around me, or even if I'm not able to hear everyone's stories, I at least want to know that I was open to the possibilities. I want to find those truly meaningful relationships with our guests and be there to understand their background and un-dehumanize them in my mind.

#college #society #social