Giving a sh--

Sometimes I wonder why we care so much about what other people think of us. Why do I care so much about what he/she thinks of me? Why do I try so hard to "show them who I really am"? If they were really important to me, they wouldn't need me to prove to them who I was, they would see me for who I really am and understand the little flaws that may otherwise distort others' perceptions. What does someone else's "approval" mean to me? I don't need that to validate me when I know who I am and am confident. Or maybe that's exactly it: I'm not as confident as I need to be to deflect misconceptions of me. It matters so much because I'm afraid that what they think of me may turn out to be true, when deep down I should know that it never will because my morals and my ideals stand strong. But it's hard. It's why I can't talk in class as freely as I wish to because I'm afraid of people's perception of me. It's easy to say - just ignore them, but it's much harder to implement it when it really boils down to it. Class discussions? I tend to get pretty passionate, most just don't know it because they only see me spectate because I don't want to seem like the overhyped, overly passionate kid in the corner. Maybe that'll change this year. Maybe senior year will help me stop giving a crap. Maybe just maybe. We'll see.